Zombie Sports... WORST TIP EVER!

I have completed my mourning over the end of the brewers season. ESPN has once again become a part of my life. I'm able to read my websites again without falling into fits of anger and depression. A couple things are keeping me going -- The Packers beat a pathetic Seahawks team, and my fantasy football roster is a Tight End short of absolute perfection. Who was smart enough to predict Aaron Rodger's incredible fantasy start to this season? I think I got the guy in the 4th or 5th round. Way to see that one you losers. Just added Chad Johnson to my team. I know the Bengals suck but come on, he's got to be worth one good game. He'll break 100 yards with a td against pittsburgh this weekend, you heard it here first.

Enough Sports. Last night -- Tuesday, October 14th -- I received the WORST TIP EVER. It was so bad it didn't even result in anger. Just confusion. I'm under the impression that it was a business dinner. One of those take out the new client deals. I usually hate these things because from what I gather, I think businesses require their employees to leave no more than a 15% tip on their corporate accounts. So, they already started with a round of drinks from the bar. I usually hate that because that takes around 30-40 bucks off my tab. This table was different though. They sit down and order one of our $80 bottles of wine. Then they start with the app. special that was running for $18 bucks that night. They follow that up with 4 salads, 4 major entrees, 4 desserts, a coffee, oh, and another bottle of wine. Except the next bottle of wine ran for $90. I'm excitied at this point. I just grabbed a table of four and put their total over $365. To gain some perspective here, anything about $200 on a table of four is considered fantastic.... So, I drop off the check and then I see the dreaded American Express Gold BUSINESS card. I reassured myself by thinking, it's cool, 15% of $365 is $54.75. That's still plenty for just one table. Well, I run the card, drop it off... They continue to hang out and talk for the next 20 minutes or so and then I see they're finally gone. I run grab the book to see what I made and then it happened... The worst tip ever -- $6.00. I kid you not, they left me SIX dollars. First reaction = This can't be right, someone must of left some cash on the table... Nope. Second reaction = Maybe he just added wrong... Nope. This guy wrote 6 bucks in the tip line and adjusted the total to correspond. Nothing went wrong at this table. A glass of water was never empty, a wine glass was never half gone. All dishes and silverware were polished. They raved about the food. This guy is just the biggest asshole of all time. Oh by the way, I got this guy's name off the card... I also have his phone number from the reservation. I'm hoping by some miracle the loser calls and attempts to correct this. Otherwise we'll see what kind of sick maniacal scheme I can come up with. Remember what happened to that guy who had my car towed in Iowa city? Well if you don't, there's a reason I didn't tell you. I don't take this kind of thing lightly. When I closed the check I didn't even take the six bucks he left on there because I considered it an insult. Well, I've got to head to work in an hour. Lets hope this problem fixed itself overnight.